Friday Dec 05, 2025
151 - Diving My Life Away - Instructor - Divemaster Version
Diving My Life Away (Divemaster / Instructor Comedy Version)
[Verse 1]
Six A.M. and the boat’s already crowded,
Students droppin’ fins and everything they own.
One forgot his mask, one says she’s "not panic,"
While clingin’ to the ladder like it’s carved from stone.
“Stay with your buddy!”—yeah, I repeat it hourly,
But they wander off like puppies in the sea.
Someone’s upside down, someone’s breathin’ too loudly—
Yep… another day of divemasterin’ for me.
[Chorus]
🎵 And I’m diving my life away,
Gotta keep swimmin’, lookin’ for a good dive day.
Chasin’ these students who float every which way,
Yeah, I’m diving my life away. 🎵
[Verse 2]
Briefing starts, I’m givin’ charts,
Pointin' out the reef and how the surge might sway.
Someone raises a hand: “Can fish smell fear?”
Well… yeah, buddy, yours can probably smell it today.
We hit the water and one student starts sinkin’,
Another ascends like a lost parade balloon.
DM brain activated, no time for blinkin’,
Rescue skills are comin’ in soon.
[Chorus]
🎵 Yeah, I’m diving my life away,
Gotta keep swimmin’, lookin’ for a good dive day.
Tryin' to stop Timmy from kickin' the reef, okay?
Yeah, I’m diving my life away. 🎵
[Bridge]
Oh, they say it’s relaxing—
But pal, that’s assuming
You’re not leading twelve new Open Water souls.
'Cause if someone’s mask floods,
Or someone kicks off their gloves,
Guess who's fetchin’ 'em?
(Yeah… add it to my goals.)
[Verse 3] (Instructor Bonus Verse)
Back on the boat, I’m fillin’ out logbooks,
Every student claims they “saw a giant shark!”
But it was just a Garibaldi minding its business,
Still, I’ll let ‘em brag at the tiki bar after dark.
Then comes the question I hear every weekend:
“So, do you do this for fun or like… for pay?”
Buddy, I laugh—“If you call this pay, that’s sweet then,”
But I’d still dive any day.
[Final Chorus]
🎵 And I’m diving my life away,
Gotta keep swimmin’, lookin’ for a good dive day.
Handin' out cert cards like I’m Oprah on the bay,
Yeah, I’m diving… my life away. 🎵
Country Pop / Country Rock Comedy
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For Use Contact Robert - robert@scdiving.com
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